“My Room”



I have an amazing partner. His name is James and we have been together almost 20 years — we met in high school. We don’t live together (I know, how very 2019 of us). We actually live down the street from each other — we jokingly call the street the compound because my studio starts the block and James’ apartment ends it. It works for us. I have a studio in my apartment, so it doesn’t work for him to live there. I sleep at my studio on nights I have 6 AM clients and sleep at the other end of the compound on the other days. Anyway, I digress. I fell even more in love with James when he moved into the compound because he anointed the second bedroom as “Kathleen’s room.” My room is an office, a dressing room, a walk-in closet, a cat-free zone, and a shrine to Christmas. He decorated it with a few of my key signs of Christmas — mugs, decorations, photos, etc.

Above and beyond the obvious sweetness of this gesture, I deeply appreciate the significance — not only does James know me, he accepts me for me, in all my workaholic, introverted, slightly neurotic glory.

I don’t love his cats, but I do love Christmas. I get up earlier than him, and the room allows me to dress without waking him up. Last, and possibly most important, I am an introvert and recharge on weekends with time at my desk writing and reflecting. I get such joy from just sitting and being productive — from being silent and not having to talk.

James gave me what I need — what a pocket of joy!!

Everyone needs a “room of one’s own,” whether that room is a chair you cuddle up in to read or a walking path you know and love. We all need space to think, to reflect, to not be judged — to just “be.” “Just being” really is a pocket of joy!! Where is your “room”?